Growl god (nsfw)


If you asked her her preference, Asha would have said that she would like to not to be awake. She would also, definitely, rather not be outside. Not in the daytime. Not at night. Not at all.

Except her preference didn't really matter right now, apparently. Because she was awake, and outside, and it was... not quite dark, but not very long before the early winter sun would set at like four thirty in the goddamn afternoon. Abraham wasn't at home, because it was a weekday and he had work or was off doing something else or whatever shit that meant he wasn't home now. Which was fine and maybe preferable.

But something else that was home was restless, and it pushed Asha to stop curling on the bed doing nothing. It pushed for activity rather than decay.

She'd rummaged through his closet looking for something, because. Her face was still fucking ugly as shit. And she found one very perfect hoodie that would work, because it was big and had some ugly version of an animal on it and apparently it was from his high school or college maybe. More importantly, she could pull the hood up over her head, and it and her hair could hide her slashed up cheek.

So it was decided, practically for her, with very little pushback on her part.

She had no goal in mind. No real destination. She wasn't seeking a place to eat or some scenic view or anything. She knew on some very quiet subconscious level that she was not the one pushing for this decision. It was the... other. The one who, day by quiet day, she realized to be the one also pushing her to eat and shower and do things that weren't just moping pathetically.

But Asha also didn't really resent it much. She didn't want her ugly swollen slashed up face seen, but laying in Abraham's bed all day wasn't really her either. Except with her arm also injured, it hurt to try to clean his place. So she was easily convinced by this other that seemed to be leading her along. Why not.

The other didn't have a name. It - she - was less a definite concrete presence Asha could visualize and more some kind of inner prowling warmth. There were vague feelings of animal-ness that she recognized in flashes, if she made herself focus. The way she stepped quietly so her sneakers did not so much as scuff the sidewalk. The way her eyes gazed around, alert and mostly unblinking, turning her head to identify every little flicker of movement. The way her ears tried to shift and wiggle to try and pick out directions of faroff sounds. The intense feeling of strength her body held, for all she'd been marred.

Probably, she should just call the other her jaguar. But Asha didn't feel quite ready to do that. Wearing clothing that wasn't hers as a compromise to agree to the roaming she was urged into seemed to placate the animal well enough.

She walked past driveways and houses. It was quiet out here, in Mountainside suburbia. Probably good for her insanely even more sensitive hearing.

Well. It was quiet until she passed by a fenced yard, and a sudden snarl startled her. Her eyes went orange, not that she knew it, and her head whipped to the side to stare down the dog that was cowering and bristling at the door to the house. Her mind was caught in some kind of trance, and a boldness both distantly familiar and totally, totally foreign held her still.

She just. Stared it down. And felt something like a twitch of suspense in her chest.

Perhaps she could intimidate it into shutting up. Into slinking away. Or, she pondered, maybe it would lose it and go balls out and try to throw itself at her in some stupid animalistic self defense.

She rested herself casually against the fence, arching a brow with an amusement that was not really hers.

She was getting out a bit more now, using whatever free time she had to get out and actually experience the world outside of her apartments. So far, she had met some good people, and not some good people. It was still relaxing though, and very much needed.

Walking along the sidewalk, Alaina didnt truly have a destination, content in just walking a huge circle that would eventually lead her back to her apartments. It was a nice day for it anyways, and pretty quiet with the exception of a pretty pissed off dog.

Dark eyes flicking towards the sound, a very covered up girl stood, so nonchalant as if the aggressive dog did not bother her in the least.

Still on the other side of the street, Aliana debated calling out, a bit frustrated that she could not be as open as Cypress. Still, she would get nowhere in life just being a recluse, and so with all the effort in the world she called out.

"Good thing its behind that fence huh?" Really, because if it wasn't, she suspected it would bite. Hard, not that the girl seemed particularly frightened.

She thought she caught the sound of someone approaching, which unfortunately meant the fun would have to end.

Her head turned sharply to face the voice across the street, and the trance broke and she was left to handle it alone. Or... mostly alone. There was like a. A lurking presence. Disinterested. She also found herself mildly disinterested.

Why had she been staring down this fucking snarling dog? Asha backed from the fence, and then shoved her hands in her — Abraham's hoodie's — pockets. Should she cross the street? Yelling across the street was fucking weird.

"Guess so," she answered, less gregariously than she was like, dunno, maybe a month ago. But she crossed the road, because. Whatever. Snarling dog. She didn't want it leaping the fence and biting her.

Would normal animal bites heal?

Tugging the hood kind of protectively over the slashes of her cheek, Asha wasn't sure if she'd chat with this girl or just keep walking. Lurky shadow in her brain wanted to keep walking.

"Um. Is it yours, or something?"

Looking putting im effort did show results! The girl was walking over, and she didnt even seem like the rude type either. Tension escaping her some as she shook her head at the question.

"No, more of a cat person honestly." Glancing at the girl, it was a bit hard to make out all of her features, the hoodie covering more or less of them.

"You live around here?"

Did she live around here. Was twenty minutes away around here. Did staying in the bedroom of a guy who clawed her face up and left her self conscious and lost as a person count as living around here.

Asha turned so the girl was seeing more of a side profile. The unsliced side, anyway. And maybe she contemplated walking in that direction.

"Just hanging around. I guess you do?" Like. What other weirdos would walk around a neighborhood.

Probably normal people, Asha. She walked around Larkspur herself, sometimes.

Well this was getting pretty awkward real fast, and Alaina was unsure of how long she could keep up all this meaningless small talk when she was sorta the only one contributing. There was a chance that perhaps, this girl did not want to speak with her, which was totally reasonable because she was a stranger after all, but still Alaina didn't wish to give up just yet.

"Yeah, in an apartment not too far from here." She began, watching as the girl turned away.


There. Wasn't. Much else to say. It felt weird asking a stranger what they did or... anything like that. They were meeting on a fucking sidewalk.

So she stuck her hand out, looking to her again, and the hood and hair unintentionally shifted away a bit in the movement.

"Asha. In case I see you again around here."

That was normal. Meeting people was normal.

Well this was it she supposed, yet another awkward conversation coming to an end. God why couldn't Alaina be a bit more sociable? She hated herself sometimes, so as the girl turned to her once more, she was prepared to say her goodbyes when a certain scratch caught her eye. It took a moment for it to process, giving the girl a moment to give her name before Alaina burst forth with nurse like speed.

"Oh my goodness, what happened to your face?" She asked, beginning to reach forward, only to stop herself before contact was made. "That looks terrible. You need to let me bandage that for you." There was no questions in her voice, looking sternly towards the girl, because no was not going to be the answer.

All it took was the hand reaching forward.

Asha jolted her head back unnaturally fast, eyes gleaming a fiery sunset orange in a split second. The jaguar had previously had no interest in this interaction, but now she was on alert, and poised to take the reins.

"It's- fine," she said with strain in her voice. Her heart thrummed in her chest, and she realized she wasn't much breathing.

"I- you don't have to."

She tried to like. Reach for calm. It was okay.

Did her eyes just change? Alaina blinked, a bit shocked, but everything seemed... Normal? Maybe it was just like her imagination or something. The girl continued to be reluctant, but Alaina was going to continue to be stubborn. She couldn't let it sit on her conscious that she had left a girl to walk around with a scratch like that. It could get infected or something, and then it would result in a scar and ruin her beauty!

"I do though, I'm a nurse, and as I said my apartment isn't far. Will you please just let me treat it, and then I'll leave you alone."

She was a nurse, Asha thought to herself.

She was a threat, the jaguar seemed to feel in return. She didn't need a nurse. Abraham had said she couldn't go to the doctor. He put the stupid liquid stitch thing on her himself.

"I-" she started. What if she touched the wounds and they hurt and.

The jaguar hovered over her brain, protective. She wanted to retreat into it. Safety. But she was a nurse.

"Okay," she answered, forcing herself into it. Against the jaguar's wishes.

She agreed, letting Alaina relax some as she motioned with her hand for Asha to follow, quickly making her way the way she came towards her apartment. It was a good thing she really hadn't gotten too far, because walking a long distance with a still possibly resistant client would have been truly awkward. You would think her used to it by now, the awkwardness she induced, but she wasnt.

"I'll make it quick and painless as I can." She promised, offering a reassuring smile.

Asha followed.

Asha felt her heart still rushing in her chest. What if this was a trap. What if she wasn't a nurse. What if she was like. A were hunter. What if her treatment hurt.

Stress was a terrible thing.

Asha clung to sanity. Was this sane? Following a cute stranger home because she said she could care for her? She tried to imagine that she would not take the offer. But then again, why not. It would save her money on a hospital bill.


"Where do y- where do you work?" she asked, her voice tense.

The girl didn't like split off and run, which was good, although she couldn't really think of a reason why she would run either. Well, maybe if she got creeped out by Alaina's forcefulness, but she hadn't so why was she allowing these thoughts to even come up. Calm down Alaina, it was fine.

"Crestview Hospital." She answered easily, glancing back towards the dark haired girl. "What about you?" She really wanted to ask how the nasty cut was acquired.

It didn't matter where she worked, Asha wanted to snip. Just shut up and get this over with so she could escape.

What an awful thing to want to say to someone who wanted to help her. Asha swallowed, her hands clutching tightly at each other through the singular pocket of the hoodie.

"Larkspur. Bartender."

Probably not anymore, she thought to herself. Pretty women made money tending bar. Ugly women lost shifts.

They arrived at her building, and Asha felt herself, or the other self, balking. This was bad news. This was dangerous. Was there any way they could just do this outside.

"Upstairs?" she asked, her chest kind of heaving a bit.

A bartender. She wasn't really one to drink, always finding it a waste of money to get your mind all foggy and compelling the body to do stupid things. Keeping these thoughts to herself, Alaina felt a tinge of excitement as the view of her apartments came forward, little two story things that were decently sized. It was a comfortable place for sure, and as she stopped before the stairs, she offered a nod to the girls question.

"Yeah, sorry." Was all she could really say as she walked up the steps, quickly opening the door to reveal a relatively clean apartment, the only thing keeping it from perfection being the six or so books open and spread out along the floor along with hand written notes. "Feel free to make yourself comfortable on the couch. I'll go grab what I need." Was all she said before disappearing into the next room.


By the time she got upstairs, she was steadily approaching freaking out. It was stupid. She was on a stranger's couch. Big fucking deal.


Asha pulled her hands in front of her, trying. Trying really hard.

She couldn't be the fuck up. She was so careful. But this was not careful. What if she came out pointing a gun or silver or something-

She whimpered as she felt a pulse of pain at her heel. Please don't. Just see if she is a nurse first. And then if she isn't, Asha would give all control over. Promise.

She waant sure exactly what she needed, and so she just sorta piled everything she had together, carrying it with both arms from her closet with Sorrel purring close to her heels. It was as they turned th corner back towards Asha that a sudden hiss was emitted, Sorrel arching her back for a quick second before bounding back into the room with her tail high.

Watching, confused, Alaiana offered an apologetic look. "Sorry shes usually really friendly."

Well, fine, fuck you too. Asha would have been friendly to the kitten if she was in a better mood. If she wasn't just beginning to bounce her leg, trying to stave off the pressure of the other. Apparently animals hated her today. What the fuck ever.

"It's fine," she said nervously, eyeing the boxes in her hands. Bandages and... other things, a lot of things, and she focused on her breathing. Chill. Do not fucking freak out your first day outside alone.

Raising a brow, Aliana turned away from her moody cat, and back towards the equally moody girl. She supposed she would be pretty moody too, if she had a few gashes on her face like that. Placing the box of abundant things down upon the table before the couch, Alaina sat herself next to Asha.

"Alright, wanna remove the hood so I can get a look?" She asked, remembering how the girl reacted the first time she had been tempted to touch her.

Asha tried to peer into the box, but.

Nothing was all that visible because now the frankly really nice stranger human was asking her to take the hood down and she tensed and that was just not really good please don't tense please relax.

"I... what are you. Gonna do. I had — I got liquid stitches on already, so."

Why was she so defensive? Alaina wanted to put, because honestly all she wanted to do was help, and Asha was just being so wary about it all. Sticking her lip out slightly in a pout, she listened to the girl, cursing the wretched Liquid Stitches.

Yes, it had some uses, but when given to the common public, well, then it could find itself being misused. You know, sometimes, a doctor was needed.

"Well, I wont know what exactly I need to do until I see it. As for liquid stitches, those are a hit or miss."

See, jaguar shadow friend, she obviously knows what she's talking about. Don't get all tense. She just wants to help.

Asha tried her best to please calm down and very, very reluctantly, pulled her hood down and moved her hair out of the way.

And also turned her face very... very slightly.

It was a start, that was all Alaina could think yo herself as the girl, so very slwoly, complied, allowing her to ginally get a better look as to what eas going on, and wow was it different.

Three large scratches coming down from the ear, and another coming up from the chin. It was most certainly different, causing the nurse to furrow her brows slightly.

This was most certainly a wound that needed real stitches, not just some off the shelf super glue holding the skin together.

"The liquid stitches. They wont necessarily be enough for this, not if you want it to heal properly." A nasty scar would probably be put in its place with just that. Stitches on the other hand, even if they left a scar, it wouldnt look quite as janky.

Dread at that. Asha had never gotten stitches in her fucking life. Never.

Why hadn't her wounds healed, she despaired. Why.

"Is it... gonna hurt."

Didn't getting stitches hurt? She thought she'd heard that they hurt. A twinge slid up through her spine in anticipation, and her eyes were orange again.

Well, Alaina turned grabbing the lidocaine cream, and holding it up for the girl to see. "Well, I have this, it numbs the skin, so while you might feel a pinch, it shouldnt be too ba-" Alainas words slowly went ti a whispering mumble as her eyes locked on to Ashas.

She had thought she had seen something similar earlier, but had written it off, now it was quite clearly showing. The eyes were no longer dark, but instead a brilliant orange. What the heck?

"Um, what happened to your eyes?"


In a second and a blink, it was gone, not that she could feel it. She was left with only a sudden sense of irritation mingled with the knowledge that she absolutely should not be here. But how did you leave without looking suspicious.

She also didn't want her face to look ugly forever. If this could help...

"Please just do this fast," she said, looking away.

It was brown again, but Alaina knew what she saw, and while she chose to hold her tongue for now. She would be constsntly looking to check to make sure home girls eyes were the same. She didnt not enjoy feeling like she was going crazy after all.

"Ill be real quick, promise." Although there were four pretty big gashes she needed to deal with. Oh well, first thing was first, alcohol to break away that adhesive.

Grabbing a soft cloth, and pouring a bit of the substance on it, Alaina slowly made her way to cleaning at the gashes. Asha was anything but jumpy so slow approaches were clearly needed.

She tried to calm down. Tried to breathe. Tried to not... give the nurse a damn reason to think she was weird.

What was it about her eyes? What happened? Was it the... color change? The orange? It had to be, she reasoned. Why'd that have to happen? Why was she not better than that? She felt the tightness in her head as her heart raced.

Asha had never been good with handling pain, and as much as Alaina tried to be gentle the wounds were still relatively fresh enough to hurt like hell with any contact at all. She whimpered, trying her best to handle this. It wasn't that bad, Asha.

Fucking. Relax.

Alaina was used to whimpering, as wrong as that sound, for she did this almost on a daily basis. It was all in making it so that there would not be more pain in not cleaning it and putting it back together properly. "i'm sorry. Once these are off I can apply the numbing cream." She promised, moving onto the last scratch along the chin, eyes glancing up once more to just like check to see if the eyes were orange or not.

Asha would not make eye contact again, luckily, because the pain was enough to have her gripping the couch cushion and scrunching her eyes shut. Pleaaaaase stooopppppp. Pleaaaaaaaaase.

Lurky shadow cat seemed to breathe in her own chest laboriously, seconds from a snarl or a hiss.

She'd numb it next. It would hurt.. less. She promised. Or something.

Please don't be dumb and burst out of her, cat. Don't be like Abraham's stupid jaguar.

And she was done, finally putting away the rag and grasping the numbing cream she had promised, applying a generous amount that would not make it too hard to apply to actual stitches. "I'll give it a few seconds to work, but in that time, did you wanna tell me how you got those scratches?" She asked, before holding her hand up. "Not that you half to tell me or anything, just curious."

The question was dangerous. But she was given an easy out. So.

"Don't want to talk about it."

Please. Please. Please just make this fast.


Alaina had been hoping for some sort of answer, and when she was denied, she had to hold back from a small little sigh. Instead, she opted to turn around and begin setting up the stitches, sterilizing the needle and the sutures. She was quite, listening to the simply ticking of her clock as time slowly went on.

It had been enough time by the time she had finished all the prep work, the numbing cream should have taken, leaving Alaina the green light to go ahead and start. Once again she was slowly approaching, glancing towards Asha for the green light from her.

It was as Alaina turned that Asha saw the needle. Cruelly curved, looking a lot like some mini version of a velociraptor claw out of Jurassic fucking Park.

There was a sharp whimper as she pulled away reactively, and then another as her hand gripped the couch hard enough to cause a joint to crack. Just. Really loud. No no no no are you fucking kidding her no what the fuck she could handle this please she didn't want her face to stay ugly please please no no no she could not handle this she did not want that in her fucking skin.

Asha recoiled at first against the couch as waves of shock rode up her arm and then she immediately leaned forward, trying to rise with a very rushed "imsosorry sorry sorry i can't handle it i needtogo," and inwardly she was trying very, very hard to barter on a deal she'd already sort of pushed to the absolute limit.

If she could manage it, if Alaina would let her, she would try to get to the door.

As the girl got up, Alaina fell back, quickly pulling the needle away so that she wouldnt like jab her in the eye or anything. Asha was pologizing, say she couldnt do it, but the liquid stitches were gone, and to leave without anything was dangerous.

Eyes widening, and hand automatically reaching forward, Alaina attempted to stop the girl, her voice stuttering out a response. "W-Wait, its dangerous." Atleast a bandage, she needed something.

"LET ME GO," she snarled with a new rasp to her voice, and it startled even her as she ripped her arm away to escape from Alaina's grasp.

She would not, however, escape the pushing of the cat, her hand beginning to snap and break. She could not help but yelp, her other still-human hand reaching to unlock the door.


She had just started grasped the lock when her back snapped into a terrible hunch, and Asha was sent to the floor gasping with one warped hand and another just beginning to wriggle and spazz. Please. Please. Please this was not the place to do this. She had minutes to work with and even less time for when her consciousness would slip from her.

Alaina. She was so sorry.

Oh god oh god oh god. Alainas hand immediately retracted as the girl fell to the ground, a terrible snapping sound resonanting throughout her little apartment. What was going on? Why was she spazzeming like that? A seizue?

Alaina moved forward, hands shaking despite Asha wishing for Alaina to stop. She couldnt, not when it was quite clear that something was going wrong.

"H-Hold on Ill call the ambulance." She murmured, shaking hands quickly pushing the emergency number on her phone.

She was going to call an ambulance. What a fucking joke. A repeat of the night Abraham clawed her.

Asha snarled, a terribly mutated hand bearing partially warped and narrowed nails lashing out at Alaina and attempting to knock the phone from her grasp.

"Don'tyouuu fucking call any- anyone," she growled warningly as saliva pooled in her mouth, eyes wildly orange and her eye sockets already beginning to shift their position on her face. Her tongue itself swelled, growing rough and languid in her mouth.

Stop, stop, please, it's too much. The pain was too much.

"Beh-rooh," she managed with what speech she had left. Go hide in your bedroom. And hope that door was enough to keep her animal from you.

Fortuitiously for Asha, her body still blocked the well-meaning and probably doomed nurse from the front door as she felt herself burgeoning against her clothes.

The phone fell woth a hard clack onto the floor, Alainas eyes locking on to this morphing creature before her. She had seen the news, and she knew about the beasts hiding in the guise of humans, but she had never expected to truly see one in person, or what she assumed to be one.

It was scary, and Alaina could feel her whole body grow weak as she fell onto the floor just as hard as the phone had. The creature was speaking, telling her something about the bedroom, and Alaina didnt take any time to quickly crawl towards the room, fear filled tears spilling from her eyes.

She took a glance towards the creature once more befpre attempting to slam her door shut.

The cat wanted control. The cat wanted to pounce the retreating woman. The cat promised an end to Asha's pain.

Asha was crying out as her jaws and cheekbones cracked and snapped and resealed themselves in a new formation. As a tail was budding and attempting to free itself from stretching and tearing jeans.

Asha wanted an end to the pain, and she all but begged for the cat to have her way. And just like that, her consciousness slipped into nothing.

The clothing would not last. There would be a few more minutes filled with horrible sounds of bones crunching and snapping and breaking, amid the rooing groans of an animal impatient to be formed.

The wounds on her face and her arm would progress much faster than they had, but that wouldn't be something she would be able to appreciate.

The animal rose a few minutes later, unimpeded by a human to rein her in, would immediately stalk to the closed door as she panted breathy, threatening huffs of snarls.

There was snarling outside of the door, and Alaina pushed herself further and further from the door, fear continuing to make her legs shake as whimper escaped her lips.

"Asha?" She called, as if it would stall whatever lay outside her door.

"P-Please" She wished she hadnt left the phone out there.

It would not, but it would confirm what the jaguar already knew.

There were ways to get in, she was sure, but she lacked the human knowledge to do so. Instead she sniffed against the door and crouched. And waited.

There was no response, which was sort of what she expected. There was no clawing at the door either, which was a plus, but it also had her curious. What if there was some other way in the room that she didnt know about. She had never expected to be in a situation like this, and so she had never really looked.

Inching closer to the door, Alaina glanced to look under the door frame, where there was fur, spotted fur.

The jaguar heard movement, and her tail twitched. Every muscle was locked in place, waiting. Wondering. Wanting.

Her claws were hidden away. Just stubby, cream toes poking out from spotted golden legs. She sniffed and huffed against the door once more, finding it to have been a successful move last time.

Come and plaaay.

Squaling, Alaina shuffled backwards, she didnt like this, not one bit. She couldnt stay in here forever though, and so with shaking legs she moved to look in her closet, wondering if there was anything she could use against the predator outside her door.

All she found was a bat. A metal baseball bat.

More movement, but not towards her.

The jaguar gave a single soft, sad roo.

It didn't last long, and her tail lashed as she returned to waiting. Pleaaaaase.

Maybe if she just sorta...

Alaina banged the bat on the door, startling herself as she shrieked and ran on top of her bed, poising the bat before her, brandishing it as if it were a sword.

The bang and the scream startled her back, and she reeled several steps with a loud and warning hiss.


This was stupid. Impatient and irate, she continued to back away, yearning to just go ahead and destroy everything.

But what a waste of time that would be. She wanted the human. Bounding suddenly, she launched her body at the door, claws out to fight it once it met her weight. If it still stood.

It rattled but didn't break, and she snarled and spit frustration as she clawed repeatedly against it.

Okay, so the bat thing had been totally her fault, but this rattling and clawing thing, that was totally on the cat creature outside her door.

Screaming, Alaina instinctively waved her bat, tears streaming as the door rattled against the weight. Why couldnt she have a connecting bathroom to run into. No, all the she had was a window.

A window....


Alaina ran to it, fumbling with switches, her shaking hands making it much harder than it needed to be.

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