Gentle Reminder

Yellow Pages 
#1
So either your skin is taking a hella long time to grow back, you've gone and died, or you've forgotten about the tiger of your life.
If you're dead, please don't tell me, I was going for lighthearted but I realize now this could backfire.
Wallace



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#2
私は虎を知らない!これは私の新しい電話番号です!テキストをもう一度入力して、私は警察に電話します!ジャガーは脂肪です!
Abraham

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#3
It was the sort of thing that got you trying not to smile even though there was no one around to see you fight it anyway.

Oh well, fat and an asshole is better than dead, I guess. If you see the fat jag, maybe tell him that I'm glad he knows how to use google translate.
Wallace

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#4
Tiger's got some spunk
maybe spunky enough to
come to a Halloween party at my place on Saturday
Abraham

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#5
One of those interactions you don't realize you miss until you have it. Wallace felt like he'd had this realization before. Time to have it again! Maybe this time it would stick!

Whoa, wait a second, now I really think your phone's been redirected to a stranger. Abraham Barlet and willing Halloween parties?
Wallace

Don't think too hard about why last year had been a bust.
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#6
It's Asha's fault
so I'm stocking the party with people I can hide in a corner with and shit talk
list is pretty short but thankfully you're real fuckong tall
Abraham

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#7
Ah, Asha. As Wallace had already suspected.

I'm going to say 'count the tall dude in' before I also ask who all is coming. What can I bring?
Also, who all is coming?
Wallace

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#8
bunch of jaguars
couple bears
me
you don't need to bring anything but a custume
costume
Abraham

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#9
Admittedly, it all sounded quite intimidating, but it also sounded like an opportunity. To count and see how many jaguars had accumulated, obviously.

And how could he say no to Abraham on his almost-birthday?

I think I can manage that. Please tell me you're dressing up, too.
Wallace

With Asha in charge? Of course he was.
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#10
pretty sure Asha would shift if I didn't
but know I'm doing it reluctantly
so you have to to be supportive
Abraham

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#11
What are you going as? I don't want to accidentally wear the same thing.
Wallace

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#12
2_face_cowboy
Abraham

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#13
Yeehaw?
Wallace

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#14
Abraham didn't need the judgment.

I mean if you really wanna do matching costumes that bad you can always dress up like a British cowboy
[Image: 2687470_orig.gif]
Abraham

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#15
For a wild second I thought you were going to suggest I show up as your horse.
To which I would say 'neigh.'
Wallace

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#16
bet you would, rainbow stripes 9_symbol_flag_rainbow 9_symbol_rainbow
I can do a job interview there so bring your resume
Abraham

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#17
There it was! What he'd been (kinda) looking for. Not the rainbow stripes joke. The job thing.

I will warn you now that I have no retail experience.
How much do I need to bribe you with? 9_object_money_bag
Wallace

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#18
Just coming to work and not calling out or shifting
if high school kids can work retail, so can you
Abraham

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#19
It was a pretty serious answer, all things considered. A little jab in there, but pretty earnestly true.

Pretty sure those are things that I can manage.
Wallace

He hoped. Acknowledging that the lady who owned the place was allegedly a vampire was... a big step for him? But if Abraham said she was chill, she had to be. And if Abraham didn't want him going tiger and eating all the plants in a nervous rage, he wouldn't take him on somewhere it would be a problem.
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#20
see you Saturday then
Caturday
Abraham

He wasn't aware that this wasn't his original term.
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#21
[Image: giphy.gif]
Wallace

Sometimes you just gotta say goodbye with an oddball gif.
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#22
Wallace was such a fucking Wallace.

Abraham was glad to have one other loser at his party.
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